The worst part of my job

Seventy students are sitting in front of me, the majority of who are taking the final exam of their college careers.  All 70 will likely walk out of the exam today and breathe a huge sigh of relief.  For most of them, 17 years of education has finally come to a close.

I also breathed a sigh of relief - mine occurred when I handed out the exams today.  A very stressful part of teaching for me is the constant deadlines, as every other day I have to be prepared to teach class at a very high level.  But now, I have 10 days to leisurely grade the exams, and the stress of deadlines is gone.

My relief didn’t last long, however.  As I look around the room, I see 70 students for whom I have great affection.  And I am looking at many of these students for the final time.  That is a sobering fact.

I remember back to when I first met many of them 4 years ago, how most of them were timid and unconfident.  I look at them today and realize just how much they have grown.  A neat thing about where I teach is that I get to watch that growth over time - I have had most of my students in multiple classes, including several students in either four or five classes, and one student in six classes.

It is not their accounting and finance technical knowledge that impresses me, it is the people they have become.  They collaborate very well with their peers, are respectful of others, do not cave to unethical behavior, communicate with confidence, and possess great leadership skills.

Although it is somewhat satisfying to look out at them and know that I have perhaps been a small part of helping them become the people they are, today is still not a good day.  I want more of them.  I want to work with them, learn from them, and push them to even higher levels.  But, that is not my place in their lives any longer.

Sure, I have had disputes with a few of these students, but we learned from each other, and these students are all good people. 

I may see some of them tonight to toast a successful college career, and I may see a few of them this weekend at graduation.  But this is the last time I will see them all together.

I have always said that dealing with academy dishonesty is the worst part of my job, with the torture of grading coming in second place.  As I sit here right now, I realize that I was wrong.  The worst part of my job is saying goodbye.

And now, they are starting to hand in their exams, so I need to finish writing and properly bid them farewell.  Because it may be the last chance I have.

A final note to all of you graduating seniors: if I do run into you in the “real” world, I will probably try to give you a big bear hug.  That’s just the type of guy I am.  So, if that sounds frightening, you better run when you see me coming!